Thursday, November 29, 2012


(Some months ago, I read a post on my daughter’s wall about misconceptions of only children, that they are spoilt, clingy, lonely, etc. That inspired me to think about myself as a mother of one, henceforth referred to as MOO in this posting.)


I am a MOO, a “mom of one.” Yes, I have only one child, one fruit of the womb. And at my age, I will be a MOO till the day I die (unless God does a Sarah thing on me). Let me tell you some truths about being a MOO.

1. I am NOT bitter, angry, or unhappy about my MOOship. As a matter of fact, I am a very content, normal, and happy person.

2. I didn’t become a MOO because I didn’t like children – and the mess, sleepless nights, pees and poos that come with them.

3. Like many MOOs, I actually adore children. That’s why I have been teaching Sunday school for more than 20 years. Just a bonus information: people who teach other people’s angelic / argumentative / attention-demanding / A-star kids for 20 years don’t do it because they have one child or no children. They simply enjoy it (crazy, huh?).

4. So why am I a MOO again? Suffice to say for now it is God’s decision. There are people who choose to be MOOs but not me.

5. Here’s a confession. I used to feel funny when people gave me strange looks when they found out that I’m a MOO. Not anymore. Now, I find it funny that they should be offended by my MOOnity. Well, I don’t live to please people; I live for God’s perfect plan for my life.

6. This next point may surprise you: I DO NOT envy those with more than one child. I didn't ask to be a MOO but now that I am, there's no sorrow to it. I’m happy – even ecstatic - for people with 2, 4, 6, 12, 18 (don’t laugh, my grandpa had 18) kids. I may sometimes wonder if they’re getting enough sleep or space, but I definitely don’t sit and sulk, thinking of them and their troops charging up the hills with the sound of music.

7. Here’s another surprise: like many of my tribe, I ENJOY being a MOO. My daughter and I could see-saw perfectly, fit into one arm chair and watch TV, share one apple, one can of drinks, one plate of chicken rice, and one bento evenly.

8. And my parenting plan is too easy: I (and my husband, the FOO – Father Of One) simply give our child all that we could generously and unreservedly. I didn’t say “fairly”; that’s because we have only one, remember? It's always fair.

9. At this point, let me thank those of you who have had sleepless nights worrying that I would raise a good-for-nothing, self-absorbed OO (Only One). Awww, you shouldn’t have. At the ripe age of 9, my daughter had already mastered pounding our family secret chilli (for steamed crabs); at 17 she catered party food to earn her pocket money; while waiting for her As results, she waitressed at Haagen Daz; and as a freshman she started volunteering for a ministry to abused children, and is still doing it.

10. And this is no attention-craving, narcissistic chatterbox. As an only child, she learned early to not fear solitude and to respect other people’s need for silence. But she is no socially-maladjusted, scrawny and miserable recluse either. She blogs, tweets, teaches Sunday school, and gets invited to too many weddings and farewells. In other words, she loves people; but she doesn't depend on people for motivation or entertainment.



Wednesday, November 21, 2012


Interesting that today,'s Yahoo News opened with "Singapore ranks as most emotionless society in the world", based on a survey by Gallup poll.
Not sure I can agree with that but this brings to mind an article by the great American theologian, Jonathan Edwards, and what he wrote about "affections" or deep feelings, deep conviction for the thing of God that 'springs us into action."
Do we love God? Do we say we have hope, joy, compassion for the fatherless, hatred for sin, mercy for those who lack?
If we do, then there must be action. For these - love, hope, joy, mercy - are not mere head knowledge; they come from deep places in our hearts where we can feel them.
And if we feel them, then it will result in praying, stepping out in faith to help, give, lend a hand, do something.
Anyone can "like" a post about the underprivileged and wounded. But the purpose of God is set in motion by lovers and doers in the kingdom.
"No time", "no leave", "no opportunity" are no excuses anymore. The only reason we are living mediocre, hum-drum lives is "no heart."

EXCERPTS FROM RELIGIOUS AFFECTIONS by Jonathan Edwards (1703-1758)

“When we look at the world, we see that people are exceedingly busy. It is their affections that keep them busy. If we were to take away affections, the world would be motionless
and dead; there would be no such thing as activity. It is the affection we call covetousness
that moves a person to seek worldly profits; it is the affection we call ambition that
moves a person to pursue worldly glory; . . . . Just as worldly affections are the spring of worldly actions, so the religious affections are the spring of religious actions.

“ . . . Nothing is more apparent than this: our religion takes root within us only as deep as our affections attract it. There are thousands who hear the Word of God, who hear great and exceedingly important truths about themselves and their lives, and yet all they hear has no effect upon them, makes no change in the way they live. The reason is this: they are not affected with what they hear.

“ . . . I believe that no one is ever changed, either by doctrine, by hearing the Word, or by the preaching or teaching of another, unless the affections are moved by these things. No one ever seeks salvation, no one ever cries for wisdom, no one ever wrestles with God, no one ever kneels in prayer or flees from sin, with a heart that remains unaffected. In a word, there is never any great achievement by the things of religion without a heart deeply affected by those things.”

Sunday, November 11, 2012


Religion gives us unending work and distractions.
God’s gift is rest from useless work and focus on His love for us,

Religion says, “You are what you do so take on one more job, plan one more program, wear one more hat.”
God wants us to be formed only by His perfect love for us, in us, and through us.

Religion uses cultural norms and man-made standards to trap us and hold us back from exercising our spiritual gifts.
God wants us to use our spiritual gifts to set people free from cultural norms and man-made standards.

Religion guarantees only exhaustion and guilt: “You’re doing too much, what are you trying to prove?” “You’re not doing enough, why are you resting?”
Relationship with God guarantees eternal life and grace: live, not labor; be, not do; major in “trust”, not in “tiredness.”

Religion keeps us occupied with doing what is expected, mediocre and enough.
Love for God pushes us to be open to the unexpected, miraculous and extraordinary.

Religion can make us look impressive and strong – “See how much she is doing!”
When you love God, be prepared to look irresponsible and strange -“Why is the perfume not sold to help the poor?”

Religion leaves us feeling judged and resentful (“Lord, she has left me to do all the serving!”).
A living, loving relationship with God sets us free us from judgment.
And frees us from religion.

eternal life is someone you follow

Reflections from Mat 19: 16-22, Jesus and the Rich Young Ruler (RYR):

The RYR had been there, done that; but his life was not complete.
He knew all the rules, had every responsibility, and practically ran the ministry.
Be he had no rest. He didn’t live the life.

Jesus told the RYR: “You don’t need one more ‘to do’,'‘to impress'."
“I am all the stripes and badges you ever need.”
“Just let go of things. And follow Me.”

The RYR protested. “But, but . . . , I don’t mind ‘to dos’, ‘to impress’. It’s what I think about all night and wake up every day for!”
“In fact, I don’t know who I am without them! I don’t know what to do without doing . . . .”

“But here’s the thing,” Jesus replied, “You got to stop.”
“You got to stop clinging on to what is not bread.
"You got to decide to not be defined by what you do."

“You see, eternal life is not something you get.”
“Eternal life is Someone you follow.
"Eternal Life is Someone you love.
"Live in."

love the ocean - God made it for Himself

About Me

In the Old Testament in the Bible, there was a man named Jacob who "wrestled with God and man." He wouldn't let God go until God answered his prayers. God admired that and renamed him Israel, "the one who fought or wrestled and prevailed". He fought with man--his inner man--and conquered his own weaknesses. He's my hero. He is what I hope God and man see me to be.